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  2. Divorce and Children - includes articles about helping children, parenting after divorce, residence orders and PAS.
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Dealing with Divorce Stress

Letís face it; getting a divorce is one of the most stressful events in a personís life. In reality, a divorce is not fun for anyone involved, even if it is an amicable divorce. Nevertheless, there are certain things that you can do to minimize the stress frequently associated with divorce.

Maintain Communication

First, if it is at all possible to do so, you should try to maintain open lines of communication with your soon to be ex-spouse. In fact, if the two of you have children together, maintaining an open line of communication will be crucial to both your own well being and the well being of your children. Therefore, has difficult as it may be, you will want to try to set aside your bitter feelings and to keep the lines of communication open.

If you have children, you will need to discuss their care and visitation with your soon to be ex-spouse. Further, such terms should be discussed without considering the bitter feelings each of you may have. You must remember that your children love both of you and to lash out at each other over visitation issues or past transgressions helps no one. In the end, you will need to try to keep differences, especially differences you may have concerning the children, under control. In doing so, you will help to significantly reduce your stress levels. Finally, if you cannot maintain a certain level of civility with your ex-spouse, you both might want to consider counselling.

In terms of communication, you might want to make every attempt to maintain contact with your soon to be ex-in laws. However, you need to bear in mind that this is not always possible. Nevertheless, just in knowing that you have done your best to keep the lines of communication open, you can significantly reduce the guilt and stress that you may feel.

Forewarned is Forearmed

You know that you are getting a divorce. With such knowledge, you can brace yourself for the troubles that lie ahead. In fact, in knowing that you and your spouse will have to divide up your property, you are already forewarned about the event and can therefore plan accordingly.

If you know that you are in the middle of a divorce, it becomes an excellent time to prepare. For instance, if you know that your spouse is going to want the leather chair in your home office because it belonged to his grandfather, why not go shopping for a new chair? One of the best things you can do to significantly reduce your stress during a divorce is to give a little leeway during negotiations. If you know something belongs with your spouse, donít keep it from them out of resentment or anger; you are only hurting yourself in the long run by holding on to your anger and resentment. The minute you let go of the need to fulfil a vendetta, you will reduce your divorce stress level dramatically!


If various aspects of your divorce are more than you can handle, get some support. Visit a group for divorcees or talk to one or more of your friends about whatís on your mind and how you should handle it. Never let your emotions remain stored up inside; it only serves to increase your stress, and quite possibily, any animosity that might already exist.

In the end, there is much you can do to minimize the stress you encounter during a divorce. By keeping the lines of communication open, by possessing a willingness to let go of anger, and by developing a support network, you can reduce the baneful stress frequently associated with divorce. Therefore, put control of your life back where it belongs by proactively battling stress!

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